The Smoker in me…

The Smoker in me…

Has been absent for what seems like and eternity.

Thank the Universe.

11 years ago today I quit smoking. I can honestly say that I have absolutely no recollection of ever being a smoker.

When I used to smoke, I found myself constantly wanting to quit, but yet never really having the motivation to make it happen. Something would always happen that would give me an excuse to start again, some kind of life stress be it great or small, I always found myself going back to it.

And then one day I woke up, and I was just done.

I was done with the constant dependence, the constant worry about not having cigarettes in the morning, or enough for the night, or whatever it was.

I was tired of spending the $6 a pack.

I was tired of the kids constantly harassing me to quit.

Tired of the taste, the smell, the coughing in the morning.

I didn’t just quit overnight, I knew from 20 years of quitting that it never worked that way for me.

I came up with a plan, I went to the doctor and with his suggestion to use Zyban to quit, I started to plan for the day.

With Zyban, you can still smoke for up to two weeks, that was my plan. I bought double the amount of cigarettes that I would normally smoke. I was determined I would smoke them all. I had a plan how many I had to smoke each day, and there was no smoking half a cigarette like I usually did, I had to smoke the whole thing. At the time I smoked Menthol Matinee 100 slim’s. They are a mile long, but smooth, well unless you were like me and had to smoke the whole thing when you were used to smoking half and then putting it out.

I started taking the Zyban, and within three days I started to notice how horrible the cigarettes were tasting. I was seriously brushing my teeth after every single smoke.

By the end of the two weeks, I was gagging the cigarettes down, I was no longer smoking because I wanted to, I was smoking to get rid of what I had bought and made myself smoke. It was the rule, I had to smoke a certain amount, period.

You know what? It totally worked, the Zyban took the edge off of the withdrawals when I finally quit smoking, as the last week dwindled my cigarette consumption was planned to lessen, but every single drag I took was disgusting. I actually hated smoking by the time I was done.

I stayed on the Zyban for 6 months, it is actually used as an antidepressant, that they found helped people quit. My doctor told me I could stay on it as long as I needed to.

While I was quitting, I taught myself how to run the computer, I bought a crappy old PC that I learned how to run, and built my first Mustang website, I have never looked back. I have never had another craving to smoke, ever, seriously.

I never thought I would be able to kick the habit, I fought with the addiction for so long.  It is absolutely true that you will never quit until you are ready, but if you really put your mind to it, you can do it, all you need is a plan and determination, if I can do it…anyone can…

Happy Tuesday the 13th my friends…

10 thoughts on “The Smoker in me…

  1. Anonymous

    Good story. Motivating to. I believe I'm one of those 'I want to quit' type of people for a couple of years now. "I'm not ready (yet) to quit", "Maybe I'm going to stop next year…". I am still a little undecided, but I know that I need to quit.


    // Jan

  2. HoaiPhai

    Zyban, eh? I've used the patch before to quit and that worked pretty well for me, except I relapsed and still smoke. The last time I quit, I did it for about two years and had constant thoughts of having a smoke. I even had dreams in which I schemed to bum smokes off of people. Maybe I'll try the Zyban. If that doesn't work I might have to resort to a lobotomy!

    1. Redneck Princess

      I used to just rip the patch off and smoke, it never worked for me and gave me panic attacks to boot, seriously try the Zyban or whatever new drug they have out for it now, I have heard Chantix works really well too, good luck my friend, hopefully we get there BEFORE the lobotomy part :)

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