The Redneck Princess

Bite me Santa!!!

Bite me Santa!!!

Bite me Santa!!!

Today is November 1st…I am going to post this on the 2nd, because I have put up too many posts for today, but this needs to be said.

I was in Shoppers Drug Mart today, and there was Christmas music.

Seriously.

Can you even imagine???

It is one freaking day after Halloween…hell I am not even over the candy and pumpkin seed hangover yet and they have the balls to play a song telling me that Santa is freaking watching me.

You know what???

I don’t care.

It’s way too soon for my bells to be jingling.

What happened to waiting until like let’s say, um….DECEMBER!!!!

Like it’s not hard enough to behave for 25 days, now you are telling me that we have to be good for 30 extra days?? I don’t think so…

I also don’t want to hear Jingle Bell Rock from now until then, hell most of the time I don’t want to hear it at all…

Now don’t get me wrong, I of all people am a Christmas person, I mean hell…I was BORN on Christmas day, but the only person on EARTH that I know that wants to listen to Christmas music from say August on… is Jaye-Anne, and she has a good excuse. Also she doesn’t make me listen to it.

It’s bad enough that the box stores don’t even get the Halloween shit out of the stores before they start loading up on the Christmas crap.

And I am not going to get ready for Christmas any faster because you are trying to shove it down my throat, really. It just makes me Grinchy. Which is NEVER a good thing. I mean if I am Grinchy, who is going to pull this damn thing off???

There are ways around it, which I am going to put into play as soon as possible.

  • Earplugs when I shop. I won’t hear anything around me at all.
  • Staying at home. I need to save money anyway.
  • Going into the bush more…I mean we always need firewood right?

And I swear to you, not one single decoration is going to come out of the boxes in my basement until at the very, very earliest…December 1st. Maybe even the 10th…I never put my tree up before then, ever.

It comes down on Boxing day too, unless I am not home, and then it is as soon as I am.

I just don’t think it is a holiday that needs to be drawn out over a two month period of time. It is great when it’s here, if you can get past all the work it takes and the stress it brings…

Last year my Dad’s best friend had me drinking Rum and Coke by 11 am…needless to say when you add some Champagne to that in the afternoon, my family was lucky to get fed at all.

And y0u know what??? My favorite part of Christmas, isn’t the decorations.

Ok…well maybe the lights…I do like the lights.

My favorite part, is my family. And the laughing, and the turkey dinner.

And pie.

Oh, and it’s my birthday, so there is cake. Ice cream cake usually…or Angel food. With frosting.

So I guess in closing, I am not really sure who to blame for the early onset of Christmas…

I am not positive that Old Saint Nick doesn’t have his hand in the pie with the big box stores, I mean he is a pretty smart dude…it could totally happen.

All I know is that enough is enough…and that if the Christmas music police need a  leader, I am their girl.

I have the winter off anyway.

I will put that on my list of jobs that have been applied for, at least I know I will qualify.

Happy November everyone…

 

2 thoughts on “Bite me Santa!!!

  1. Jaye

    Ok, as you said in your post I LOVE Christmas…but even I, yes I, am finding it a tad too early for Christmas stuff out. Living in the US, I still have one more Thanksgiving to get through (Nov 22nd!)so even I don’t want to have my bells jingled or my nog boosted with something delightful until AFTER American thanksgiving……and even I won’t be putting up my tree till after December 1. Me….the gal who is considering being a sister wife for Santa! :)